I saw this while walking through some worries. I have to choose between some good choices. Instead of comparing the various virtues and qualities of the choices, I was compulsively weighing risks, using long passed and irrelevant injuries as measure. Everything was incommensurable and awkward. I started feeling more and more inconfident, almost certain that [...]
Archive of posts filed under the personal category.
Brian Walker
My best friend died last week. I’m still unclear on the details of his death. When I visited, it seemed he wasn’t very clear about it himself. He was quite lucid on several occasions and I got some datum points in short stories: One year, one month, one week and one day sober; A 1.75 [...]
A Measure of Success
Flora put this above the door down to the basement, where my office is. This pretty much says it all. We broke even in March financially, and in its first week, April looks good. I’ve got a part-time job with customerforce along with a few new gigs, and some huge possibilities. After being in such [...]
New Web Page and Resume
I recently had a mention in BusinessWeek. Though it certainly wasn’t a This guy is awesome! You should hire him!, it did send quite a bit of traffic to my site. This made me aware that my website and resume still suck, even though I’ve been leaning on both rather heavily. So here it is: [...]
Echos of Ordinary
Lately I’ve been having strong memories, almost re-experiences, of extremely mundane things. I’ll be walking upstairs from the basement and I will be instantly in a cold morning on a second-story deck of an apartment. I’m in a t-shirt and regretting that. I’m smoking the first cigarette from a large can of cigarettes given to [...]
Shovel Ready
I made yet another commitment today to being hopeful. I’m finding less and less of my failures have to do with my circumstances and more and more have to do with me. I’m finally becoming convinced from this that much of my successes are not from good fortune alone or even primarily. Though I have [...]
Settling The Horizon
After some somewhat urgent dentistry, I walked through a growing storm. Even though I really can’t take pictures when it gets this dark, I ended up taking a lot of pictures. None of them turned out. Still, a large number of bad photos is appropriate to now. I’ve been trying to imagine myself as so [...]
On My Toes
I’ve been exploring a lot professional opportunities lately. None of them are firm. None of them are yet a path. I walk around on tippy toes, trying to find a foot size spot of earth for the first step. In other news, I completed a twitter bot for nshrine. Twitter users can place candles by [...]
I Now Know Five Things
I used to know four things. I mean really, really, know, for certain, in a shut-up-you-can’t-tell-me-otherwise. Because it’s important to feel this way about something, and dangerous to feel this way about the wrong things, I revisit the List of Things I Believe often. This time, I made a dramatic addition to the list while [...]
nshrine.com sees a milestone
Over 25,000 candles have been placed in public shrines (and now private shrines) on nshrine.com. Though it was a public candle in a well-traffic shrine, I don’t feel quite okay about linking directly to it here, as it was a candle of mourning. So I have mixed feelings about the milestone. Though if you browse [...]